In my last blog, I shared how the past 12 months had kinda been "the year that was." I also said I would write more in detail about the part that was "the best of times."
In Jauary of 2012, we were contacted by a woman who identified herself as a professional adoption searcher. She stated that she was representing a woman in Lubbock, Texas who placed her baby boy for adoption in December of 1984. She knew from searching records that my husband and I had adopted our Aaron in Lubbock, and that he was born on December 12, 1984. She also knew that Aaron had passed away about 10 years ago at age 16. She began to ask me some questions about our adoption, but I told her that we could cut to the chase because I knew the name of Aaron's birthmother--Deborah Denise Cantu. After just a moment of stunned silence, she replied, "that's it!" We spoke for quite awhile about this, how she found us etc. We left it that she would notify Deborah, and with my permission, Deborah could contact me if she wanted to do so. Pam also told me she had done over a thousand searches and this was the only one she felt "something stronger than herself" guiding her in it!
It grieved me to know that now Deborah would have to know and deal with the loss we had been dealing with for the past ten years, the loss of our precious Aaron. I knew that this was most certainly not the way she had expected things to go. She later told me that she had prepared herself for possibly anger from Aaron or bitterness, but never considered he could be gone! The searcher, Pam, acknowledged it would be tough but she felt Deborah probably needed that overworked word of "closure" and I agreed that was likely true. Sometimes I had considered Deborah (though I didn't know her) and wondered if all her life she might wonder why Aaron never looked for her. So now..."closure" it had to be. I quickly contacted some people to pray for Deborah as she learned the news about Aaron that day.
About a week later, I received a card followed by a phone call from Deborah. We spoke at length over the phone. (Deborah and her family live in Lubbock) we both agreed that we wanted to meet each other, and she assured me that her family occasionally traveled to the Dallas area. Thankfully, they were able to come down sooner rather than later, and we met in person in late February. Deborah had married a widower 16 years ago named Victor. Victor had 3 children, Celeste, Christian and Samuel, when they met and married. Deborah and Victor later had 2 children together, Eli, age 14and Calys, age 12, who are Aaron's half brother and sister. Well, to make a long story short, which I think I'm too late for, we have met four times now with them actually staying at our house twice. In short, we LOVE the Jimenez family. They are a wonderful Christian family and it has been my joy to share Aaron's life with Deborah. This is not your typical adoption story, but it makes all the sense in the world to me. We loved Aaron soooo much, and knowing his birthmom and half siblings seems like finding a piece of Aaron when I thought there was no more!
In Jauary of 2012, we were contacted by a woman who identified herself as a professional adoption searcher. She stated that she was representing a woman in Lubbock, Texas who placed her baby boy for adoption in December of 1984. She knew from searching records that my husband and I had adopted our Aaron in Lubbock, and that he was born on December 12, 1984. She also knew that Aaron had passed away about 10 years ago at age 16. She began to ask me some questions about our adoption, but I told her that we could cut to the chase because I knew the name of Aaron's birthmother--Deborah Denise Cantu. After just a moment of stunned silence, she replied, "that's it!" We spoke for quite awhile about this, how she found us etc. We left it that she would notify Deborah, and with my permission, Deborah could contact me if she wanted to do so. Pam also told me she had done over a thousand searches and this was the only one she felt "something stronger than herself" guiding her in it!
It grieved me to know that now Deborah would have to know and deal with the loss we had been dealing with for the past ten years, the loss of our precious Aaron. I knew that this was most certainly not the way she had expected things to go. She later told me that she had prepared herself for possibly anger from Aaron or bitterness, but never considered he could be gone! The searcher, Pam, acknowledged it would be tough but she felt Deborah probably needed that overworked word of "closure" and I agreed that was likely true. Sometimes I had considered Deborah (though I didn't know her) and wondered if all her life she might wonder why Aaron never looked for her. So now..."closure" it had to be. I quickly contacted some people to pray for Deborah as she learned the news about Aaron that day.
About a week later, I received a card followed by a phone call from Deborah. We spoke at length over the phone. (Deborah and her family live in Lubbock) we both agreed that we wanted to meet each other, and she assured me that her family occasionally traveled to the Dallas area. Thankfully, they were able to come down sooner rather than later, and we met in person in late February. Deborah had married a widower 16 years ago named Victor. Victor had 3 children, Celeste, Christian and Samuel, when they met and married. Deborah and Victor later had 2 children together, Eli, age 14and Calys, age 12, who are Aaron's half brother and sister. Well, to make a long story short, which I think I'm too late for, we have met four times now with them actually staying at our house twice. In short, we LOVE the Jimenez family. They are a wonderful Christian family and it has been my joy to share Aaron's life with Deborah. This is not your typical adoption story, but it makes all the sense in the world to me. We loved Aaron soooo much, and knowing his birthmom and half siblings seems like finding a piece of Aaron when I thought there was no more!
